A few days ago, someone had asked Onir on social media, “Why do queer people make coming out a big deal? Straight people don’t have to do the same.” The filmmaker tells us, “Straight men and women do not have to be closeted.
There is nothing for them to hide.
Their existence, desire and love- it is all out in the open.
And the reason we come out is to claim our spaces outside the closet so that we have a world where we don’t need to be in the closet.”
In a Pride Month special interview with us, Onir speaks about mental health, love and queer representation in cinema…
‘Queer people are going back to unsafe spaces’
Onir feels that while many speak about the pandemic has brought them closer to their families, this period has been doubly tough for the queer community “For a lot of queer people, being home means going back to space where they are not accepted and celebrated.
In such instances, they either have to hide their sexuality or face abuse and threats for expressing themselves freely.
This causes a lot of anxiety and mental health issues, adding to the trauma that the queer community faces every day,” says the My Brother Nikhil director.
He adds that he regularly gets calls asking for work or seeking help regarding mental health issues, from the community.
“He shares, “Mumbai is an expensive city to live in, and many people have left because they cannot afford it anymore.
Queer people are constantly worried about how to escape the unsafe places they are returning to.
It is really heartbreaking to see so many of them suffer like this.
I wish I could help them all.”
‘Pride Month is needed to make the right noise’
Along with the Pride Month celebrations, another important development is in the process right now.
Onir explains, “With the Pride Month, we are also in the process of the Delhi High Court’s hearing about same-sex marriage, which is a very important step for us.
The next hearing is soon (July 6).
However, it is constantly debated by people who oppose it for the most ridiculous reasons.
Having said that, this month is for the recognition of what we have achieved as a community.
It has been a long struggle for us.
I am often amazed by how many people choose to remain silent about LGBTQ+ rights.
So, Pride Month is needed to make the right noise.”
“I hardly see a real representation of queer people on screen”
There’s been a discussion about queer representation in Indian cinema for a while now.
Sharing his opinion on the same, Onir says, “People forget that we are the largest film making country in the world.
To me, Dostana is not an LGBTQIA narrative.
When I’m talking about real films which deal with our lives, I hardly see them, even today.
The percentage is very small.
Earlier, when I made My Brother Nikhil, it was termed as ‘not box-office friendly’.
Today, the box-office word has been replaced with eyeballs.
When I did some of my best work, nobody told me about eyeballs.” And have OTT platforms made a difference? To this, he says, “The so-called freedom that one has with OTT platforms is an overhyped myth because whatever you do, it has to go through various levels of scrutiny by people who think they can evaluate what you have done.
I won’t say everything is bad; the good stuff is also happening.
But queer representation is very less.”
‘Dating for me comes with baggage, not because I’m gay, but because I’m a filmmaker’
Opening up about his dating life and thoughts on marriage, Onir shares, “For me, dating becomes a bit different because I am a filmmaker and it mostly comes with baggage.
It is not about my age or me being gay.
The only thing people see is that I am a filmmaker and I might be their roadmap to something.
My parents feel that if they are not around, I should have a partner.
The only thing is that I don’t have a partner right now but the guys I dated, they lived with me, and my parents always graciously accepted them and loved them.” He adds, “My parents want me to get married and if same-sex marriage is recognised in India, I would like to get married too, not to conform to anything, but to make a statement that it is my right to get married too.
The sad part is that gay partners don’t even get legal rights.
Hence, recognising same-sex marriage is very important.”
‘Coming out should be celebrated’
Onir is of the opinion that society has been dominated by heteronormative narrative, and he stresses the importance of coming out.
He shares, “We have to come out of the closet to be visible.
If we can’t be visible, that means there’s fear and shame.
When Dutee Chand came out, it was absolutely inspiring that a sportsperson did it.
I wish in my fraternity too people would come out and celebrate themselves instead of playing hide and seek.
Coming out will inspire not just youngsters, but their families too because they will understand and accept.
So unless you are an extremely selfish person, you should make an effort to celebrate queerness.”
